Correspondence

S: 21st Birthday Speech

James and I knew of each other back in high school, but we were never really friends. It was not until last spring when we started to pick things up from where we left off.

It all began when I stumbled upon James’ Facebook profile picture one fine day, the one in which he was crossing the finishing line of the Melbourne marathon. It was a flattering image. Instead of a picture of a person, face slightly contorted with gasping effort, it was an image of James completing a marathon with a slight frown. He made running 42km for 5 hours look effortless, and that was impressive.

I proceeded to comment on my amazement on the fact that he had completed a full marathon. James was probably flattered, because thereof he initiated an avalanche of text messages and eventually asked me out on a coffee date.

It turns out that James was not even a fan of coffee; but what became of a coffee date turns out to be a wonderful lunch date. We spent an entire afternoon eating lunch on the lawn, basking under the glorious sunshine, enjoying spring colours in resplendence and each other’s company. There was a lot of talk to make up lost time; and we laughed coyly awful lot. It was sweet in its simplicity and that was how we began (what you could almost say) a spring romance.

Over the months, I have gotten to know a lot more about James.

One thing that really stood out for me when I first get to know him is that he is a very thorough person; and what I mean by thorough is that he often does extensive and painstakingly detailed research into a matter before making a decision.

1. Before asking me out on our first coffee date, James asked me a few rather interesting questions, probably to make sure that I am of an appropriate date material, and those questions are: Are you fit? Do you like cooking? Do you watch Master Chef?

2. On the first day he visited my place, James took a tour around my apartment, and then he started going through my fridge and kitchen cabinets. James was impressed that there was no junk food in my pantry, but my bare fridge that stores only mung beans made him conclude that I do try to eat healthily, and...I was probably living on a poverty line.

3. His research did not just stop in real life. It extends to the cyber world. I remembered when he told me that he found out the social networking site I was anonymously micro-blogging at, and he joked that he did a check on me before making a move, I swear I thought he was like Bart Bass from Gossip Girl, and I was somehow convinced that he googled me.

But the point is, James being incredibly thorough and careful with almost every single decision he makes, and before each step he takes, he makes good decisions with things in life and I feel very much at ease and secure in allowing him to take the lead. For one, he is often puzzled that I never do look left and right whenever I am crossing the road with him.

James has an ability to make me go-around smiling to myself silly, or making me stare at him for hours on edge, my heart swelling with adoration.

I remember the countless of times when James would visit me bearing gifts; the times when he surprises me with goodies sitting on my kitchen counter upon my return home. I remember this one time when I got home after an exam to find a packet of Tim Tams sitting in my fridge with a sweet note attached it.

James has always been observant and helpful. He volunteers to do tasks necessary to fix things up and make my place a better fit for human habitation.
1. I remember how I would go home to realise my broken cabinet door fixed, and my broken light-bulbs changed.
2. I remember how he would oil my squeaking door, tightening screws here and there, or repair whatever that needed to be repaired without me even asking him to.
3. He would place importance in getting things for me. He shopped for a laser printer for me, well before my exams so I could study better. He knew how I was struggling with a broken fridge and so he shopped for a fridge for me, bargained and transported it, carried it all the way into my house with the help of a friend (thanks again Justin); and carried my broken fridge all the way down my apartment.

I remember this one time when James was kneeling in my bathroom, scrubbing mould off my bathroom tiles. He even bleached my sink and scrubbed my toilet bowl. Key word: voluntarily. It was a sight to behold. My heart melted with adoration and I remembered thinking to myself that I am dating the finest guy ever.

All these occasions found me floaty and dreamy. James knows full well of my love language. Most of the time I’d much rather have a hug or his undivided attention, yet the surprises still come, and each time they do, they just hit the spot, and makes me feel very much loved.

That said, James is equally as helpful at home and he is someone who makes an effort to generously give and offer whatever he can to his family members and friends – whether it is cooking up a storm, or making gingerbread houses as Christmas gifts for friends and family, offering a piece of advice or even being there for another.

It is not just the gift or the act of services itself. It is the fact that he made an effort to remember what you need, what you like, what you want; the fact that he offers his act of service without the need to ask; the fact that he took the time and the effort to lend a helping hand.

It is often said that the way to a man’s heart is his stomach, but with James’ cooking skills and baking talents, James found his way to my heart, partly through my stomach. He is an excellent cook. He makes amazingly delicious food and awesome desserts. His ability to cook up a storm for family members, relatives and friends leaves me in awe.

That said he also makes me laugh a lot with his quirks, boyish charm and cheekiness. He makes me very happy, and he makes me feel very blessed and lucky to have him in my life.

We are two people on a journey, seeking for a perfect ending; and sometimes, there are bends in the road, but I am grateful to have him as my partner, my best friend and my support. He pushes me hard, in questioning why I believe the things I do, in the things that I was lacking insight, in the things I should place more importance or that I had rashly overlooked in life, in taking steps to achieve the dreams I dream. I equal parts hate him and love him when I was in the midst of giving up that he pushed me even harder, but eventually come to realise that I love him more for that.

“Tough love”, he always says. He challenges me, makes me uncomfortable at times, pushes me beyond my boundaries and pushes me to become a better version of myself, and if it weren’t for you, James, I would not have made what was seemingly impossible, possible.

You cook meals for me and help me out in the kitchen when things get out of control. You send emails to me almost every morning when you get to work, just to say hi. You take me out on day-trips. You drive me home all the time, all the way from Templestowe to the city and then back home – 40 minutes journey all up. You make it a point to take time out from your busy schedule to spend time with me because you know how much I value spending quality time with you. Your quirks and the things you do and say to me every day, still make my heart skip a beat.

You are the best thing that happened in my life and I am so ever thankful and grateful to have you holding my hand and journeying with me through the highs and lows, ups and downs. Thank you for being such a wonderful person. And what I have said in my speech of you, are just the tip of the iceberg of what an amazing person you are.

And as cliché and as cheesy as this may sound, there are no words that can describe how much you mean to me and how much I love you. Happy 21st birthday, James.

10/4/2010

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J: Beautiful Bouquet of Roses and a Note

Dear Shin,

Thank you so much for all the hard work and effort you put in last night. You made the best speech I could ever asked for and impressed my family. I love you so much for putting up with me when I'm not at my best. You are the most important thing in my life. No matter what, as long as I have you in my life, I am happy and always will be.

Love you forever bunny.

James 11/4/2010