Monday, December 28, 2009

2 Months Honey!



"People universally tend to think that happiness is a stroke of luck, something that will descend upon you like fine weather if you're fortunate enough. But that's not how happiness works. Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it. You must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it. If you don't you will leak away your innate contentment. It's easy enough to pray when you're in distress but continuing to pray even when your crisis has passed is like a sealing process, helping your soul hold tight to its good attainments." Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat Pray Love.

It's the maintaining part that is difficult I suppose. The constant mighty effort to stay afloat on top of it, lest the failure to do such would result in a horrible descend of despair - failure to keep up to standards of expectations expected of yourself, perhaps indirectly from the others. That's one of my constant struggle.

I think if I'd type as though I don't owe Vanilla Poetry an explanation, I would have jot down every single snippets of my life that amuses me. The last post was a well-needed explanatory post. Well, for the fact I had done a pretty good job in spring cleaning up this long abandoned website, somehow finding myself leaving yet another temporary, scarcely used blog to be back on this one. I find myself so much at ease when I am able to set whatever typeface and font size. Yes. Obsessive compulsive order.

Spring cleaning. Ah. The dotted naivety that spread all across my archive! I'd like to think it's been a long time coming and I am now a different person, but still embarking on a journey of growing, constantly but perhaps more frequently assessing and evaluating my personal identity and directions (much to the extent I had a hard time naming this blog again).

So, this will just be one of those empty posts. Glad that I had somewhat found my voice, though much fine-tune is needed. Just a note to announce that I am alive and perhaps the resuscitation of this space. If I am ever disciplined enough to keep blogging, that is. So, hello again!

An extremely long hiatus. I am now a very different person.

Friday, May 23, 2008

It suddenly hit home hard. I guess I have been the stupidest, dumbest idiot in the world all this while. And, I have got only myself to blame.